Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
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