I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
he thought i was a dude.
just got out of a noise viloation because the cop recognized my roomate as his favorite chipotle burrito roller. just another reason I love ritos
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
pop tarts are not kleenex
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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