If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize
