I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
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