You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
Just checked my missed calls... why did you call me 37 times from 2:14 to 3:58?
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
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