its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
I think that's the first time i've seen 'you look like an ugly version of my ex' work as a pickup line
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
Real life skills section of my resume: blow jobs, food knowledge trivia, sarcasm, mascaera application, sexting, tolerance of rail liquors
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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