His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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