Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
Randomize
