I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
