Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
Randomize
