at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
Randomize
