Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
You called a girl at 4:30am to tell her "your pussy is my top priority" while simultaneously Urban Spooning late night cafes.
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
Why I hate online dating: not even one day in and a 57 year old asks me to call him "Daddy."
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
