He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Randomize
