North Korea, Best Korea!
There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
if i get killed by an online date, its your job to tell my parents that we met at church
At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
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