where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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