I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
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