yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
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