i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
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