Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
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