So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
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