We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
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