is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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