im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
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