But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Can I color on your dick again?
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
Randomize
