You're my little dorito
I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
Randomize
