I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
I'm going to write a letter. It's going to say, Dear Every Girl Ever: Take some goddam initiative and wake me up with a blowjob and I will eat out of your hand. Love, Every Guy Ever
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
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