All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize