it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
Randomize
