Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
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