i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
Randomize
