Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
You high fived me for banging your sister but lock me outta house bc I ate your pumpkin pie? Priorities bro
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
Randomize
