I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize
