I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
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