...so i touched it.
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
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