Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
when I die covered in cocaine, hookers, and tequila at 73 years old just remember that I once had a tweet with that many retweets
Randomize
