Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Randomize
