Will you take my knitting needle, stick it far up my nose, reach in my frontal lobe and give it a few swirls?
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize