I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
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