were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
Randomize