So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
My freaking DENTIST just commented on my hickies. Through the novacaine I managed to mumble 'It was my birthday' and she smiled knowingly.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
Randomize
