your room smells of hookers.
And success
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Randomize
