Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
