I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize
