GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
Randomize
