I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
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