i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
Turns out that my surprise "happy birthday" drop-in for my dad turned into a "my parents like afternoon sex a lot" realization.
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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