absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize
