Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize
