seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
Randomize
