I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
the hot woman interviewing me is reading jokes off the back of laffy taffy.... I'm getting laid and possibly a job
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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